Straight Talk – The ‘UpBringing’

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I have been following a lot of what has been happening on the major social issue that has taken a toll on the Nation. My previous blog has said a bit about it. I am constantly drawn to the attention of this issue, not only as a law abiding citizen, not only as a woman, but also a deep observer of man woman relationships. Across the civilized worlds, as they watched and saw the brutal assault that happened in this part of democracy, countless questions have been raised on the subject of women – safety, respect, stringent laws and many more. Voices have been raised on the immoral acts of women that continue till date. Not only here, everywhere else.

I have been reading and pondering over one distinct aspect in the liberal world about both men and women. How much they have advanced, both in thinking and behavior, education and empowerment. The fact that we are ruled now by multiple women rulers says volumes about the progress. Or is it? In the world where men and women are going head to head, to co-exist in the society, marriage, and careers, I can’t help but ask a question – how much of the focus is going on the upbringing of both the sexes in the society?

They say, how a man treats a woman is directly co related to how he was raised by his mother. Interestingly, fathers are the afterthought. I believe this statement now as a mother myself. The upbringing of our children decides a complete future of their existence in this world. Are we really being right in bringing them up? That men and women will treat each other ‘fair’ and ‘right’ has been really looked into as a central issue while raising a child? The magnitude of this affecting their co-existence, how much has it been really considered or is being considered by the parents?

The society itself facing the pressures of socio-political crisis, where men and women continue to fight for their space, independence and ego satiation, are we right about the way the current education is focusing on the required social behavior? Does the education really help in the process of constructing the morality of an individual or do we also need something like a psychology rehab? How many of us are really talking to our children about the social issues that crumble our economy and individuals? I wonder..

The system of upbringing exists both in civilized and uncivilized worlds. Looking at the pattern of incidents going on in the ‘urban’ parts of the country, can we really dare to say we are better than the uncivilized? If so, what have the previous generations and the current ones really learnt out of it? Men treating women inhumanly on the streets speak something about us being helpless – that we are ashamed we have not many civilized people amongst us. If the repercussions of not having enough upbringing questions our system, should we not work towards a better upbringing of the future generation.

That we have to really work towards educating our young men and women against social evils like drugs, sexual harassment and relationship abuse says we need to be proactive. Voicing and initiating against something that has unfortunately transpired is simply not enough. Working towards better individuals and civilized psychologies is equally a challenge and a must need. That we have spent a fortune on their schooling and college is not enough. That we have to spend enough time with them to mould them to be good humans is a must need.


Follow more of Deepa’s thoughts on her blog, A coup over cappuccino –



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